Local News & Commentary Since 1890.

Archive for the ‘psychology’ Category

, , , , , ,

Author Shares Journey of Love and Despair as Caregiver for a Mother Ravaged Dementia

In Books, Education, Entertainment, Health, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, sociology, Uncategorized on May 30, 2013 at 1:43 pm

Elaine Pereira yearbookGREENE COUNTY, OH –  Author Elaine Pereira shared the seemingly never-ending journey of caring for her mother stricken with dementia in her newly-released book I Will Never Forget: A Daughter’s Story of Her Mother’s Arduous and Humorous Journey through Dementia (ISBN 978-1-4759-0690-5). The award-winning author will be visiting Xenia for two public events, June 6 and 7.

I Will Never Forget is a powerful true story of the author’s talented mother, Betty, and her poignant and humorous journey through dementia. As their mother-daughter relationship evolves, Elaine copes with her mom’s uncharacteristic verbal assaults and watches as her brilliant mind is slowly destroyed by dementia’s insatiable appetite for brain cells.

Elaine Pereira earned a BS in Occupational Therapy and an MA in Family and Consumer Resources from Wayne State University and worked as a school occupational therapist for more than 35 years before retiring in June 2010. In this moving account, Pereira shares warm and humorous incidents as well as tragic and overwhelming encounters from the death of her father, sister-in-law, brother and her mother’s journey through a new world after her familiar world fades from her memory.

“This is a true story which validates the incredible events that happened in my mother’s life,” says Pereira. “From writing nine checks to the same payee, on five consecutive days, and later on the Great Houdini Escape when she nearly froze to death, Mom’s journey through bewildering dementia is real.

Cover I Will Never Forget 1-15-13I Will Never Forget is educational and therapeutic but is a journal full of insights that will provide helpful assistance and tips to other caregivers of dementia patients. “I want newly-commissioned caregivers to learn from my unwitting mistakes, to realize that reasoning and logic are rarely helpful dialogue techniques with a dementia patient,” explains the author.

“That approach is confrontational and often creates agitation and a fear response in someone. Redirection, re-phrasing, waiting and patience are the most helpful response strategies to diffuse potentially hostile situations.”

During the year long writing process, Pereira was able to put the troubling incidents in her mother’s final years in perspective. “The little problems faded away and the core of her wonderful life surfaced for me. That is how I want to remember her, as she was in my eyes as a child.”

Pereira’s book was named a finalist in the Best New Non-Fiction category of the 2012 USA Book Award and was an honorable mention finalist in non-fiction in the 2012 Hollywood Book Festival and was bestowed a ‘Rising Star’ and ‘Editor’s Choice award by iUniverse. The book most recently won the aging category in the 2013 National Indie Excellence Awards.

At 7PM, Thursday June 6, Pereira will speak to the members of the Western Ohio Writers Association at  Blue Jacket Books, 30 S. Detroit St. in Xenia, Ohio, with an emphasis on how and why she wrote the memoir about her experience. The event is $5 per person, open to the public, and RSVP is requested by emailing the organization’s director, Gery L. Deer, wowainprint@gmail.com

The next evening, Friday June 7, beginning at 7PM, the author will be at Blue Jacket Books, 30 S. Detroit St. in Xenia, Ohio, to speak about the experiences so many people now have in caring for a parent or other loved one suffering the ravages of dementia and Alzheimer’s disease. There is no charge for this event and seating is first come first served. For information call 937-376-3522. The author will be selling and signing books at both events.

, , , ,

Disasters help us appreciate the easy things

In Children and Family, Opinion, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, Uncategorized on May 22, 2013 at 11:13 pm

Deer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

What’s your life like? Are you regularly faced with life-changing decisions? Is your life in danger with uncommon regularity? Fortunately, not many of us have to face such situations in our daily routines.

First response officers (police, fire, EMS), U.S. Secret Service agents and military personnel in war zones are probably some of the few groups of Americans who routinely face life-threatening events. For the rest of us, a visit to Walmart can put us into fight of flight mode.

A favorite author of mine once noted that when faced with a completely hopeless, potentially life-ending situation, one should consider how good life has been up to that point. On the other hand, if life hadn’t been so good, one should think about how lucky it is that it won’t be troubling you for much longer. The point is that usually, life’s situations are rarely as hopeless as we think.

Nearly two decades ago, on a beautiful summer day, on a quiet country road in the middle of nowhere, I was faced with just that kind of situation, but it all happened in the blink of an eye. While driving one of our farm trucks to pick up hay, a massive cement mixing truck struck my vehicle, head on, left front fender to left front fender, with unbelievable speed and force.

The power of the collision destroyed my truck and literally cut the front wheels and axle out from under me, burying the frame, nose first, into the asphalt below. A heartbeat later, I was sitting motionless in a shower of debris, dust and glass as the big Louisville Ford crashed to a halt in the hot sun.

Without sounding overly dramatic, had the other vehicle been six inches further to my right when it struck my truck, I’d have been killed instantly. There is much more to the story, but what stands out here is how different your life’s perspective is when you come that close to death. In fact, I actually remember bursting out in laughter.

My father had been in front of me, helplessly watching all of this unfold in his rear view mirrors. As we stood in the street surveying the wreckage, I busted out laughing and said, “My brother’s going to kill me.” After all, it was his truck and he hadn’t had it too long. Oh well, I thought, that’s life.

When faced with life-threatening events like the massive tornado in Oklahoma on May 20th, our perspectives change in an instant and what seemed important one second becomes the last thing on your mind a moment later. Maybe the lesson to take away from these events is about how much we value our day-to-day lives, or rather, how much we devalue them.

Every day without suffering, disease, pain or trauma is a gift. We should appreciate anytime we can just sit back, take a deep breath and think how calm and good life is at that moment. Most of us don’t do that, though.

In our country, we seem to be a little too preoccupied with what we don’t have to appreciate what we do. I remember times at family events when I literally stopped, sat there and looked around, and, like on a camera or video tape, tried to capture the image of family and friends laughing, smiling and being happy to be together, just in that instant. I have stored countless gigabytes of space in my head full of nothing but that – appreciation for the moment.

Admittedly, I don’t do it as much as I should and I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone else who does that. But when life’s hard, or you can’t seem to find the good in a moment, it’s nice to be able to close your eyes and go back to those times to give yourself a sense of peace and calm. It makes you appreciate every moment just a little more.

 

Gery L. Deer is an independent columnist and business writer from Jamestown, Ohio. More at http://www.gerydeer.com

, , , ,

Who am I, and what am I doing here?

In Entertainment, Health, Opinion, psychology, Religion, Senior Lifestyle, sociology, Uncategorized on May 15, 2013 at 12:04 pm

Deer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

We’ve all had moments when we’ve turned to someone, a father, a brother, a God and asked, “What was I meant for? Am I doing what I was supposed to do?” It’s a normal exercise for us to question our situation, regardless of its status.

But we have to be careful to realize, regardless of how much we’d like the world to be a mystical place, our own choices landed us where we are and nothing was “meant to be,” that wasn’t directed by personal decisions.

I think it’s pretty normal to think we were meant for something more than we are, at least most of us probably feel that way. What many people tend to miss is how much value their lives have to others and how much would be different in the world without their contributions.

Over the last few years, I’ve written a great deal about my late mother, Lois. She passed away in November of 2011 after long battle with Alzheimer’s disease which among other things robbed her of a lifetime of memories.

Mom wasn’t an overly complicated person but she was very smart and caring, always putting others ahead of her – particularly her children and grandchildren. She only ever worked as a school volunteer, on the farm with Dad and for a time as a waitress in a little hometown restaurant where I grew up.

She might not have had the life people grow up dreaming about, but I’d like to think she felt like she had made a difference in the world. I know she did for me and my family. She didn’t have money or status or important connections, but she had wisdom and a level of understanding of her world and those in it that I truly wish I could emulate.

To some people a basic, down-home lifestyle could seem like Purgatory; a futile, pointless existence. Even though she didn’t have a list of college degrees after her name, nor did she work some high-powered job (unless you count managing my dad), her mere influence upon those around her probably had far greater reach than she ever knew.

In my mind, Mom had the life she was “meant” to live, evidenced by the efforts of those who helped care for her and offer support to our family as her illness advanced. We all have a place in the world and it might not seem like it matters at the time, but we are often more influential than we realize.

Since the kind of work life I have chosen does not lend itself to earning fistfuls of cash, far from it, I have always hoped that my labors have at least helped to enhance someone’s life, even in the slightest. Whether I am making people laugh on stage during The Brothers & Co. variety shows, or passing along my worldly observations in my writing, I always try to give people something that will help make their life better, even if it’s only for a moment. To me, that’s rewarding in itself.

Even when people don’t agree with something I’ve written, the point to take away is that they read it, and it made them think. I don’t want everyone to agree with me, nor am I trying to persuade them to alter their life paths based on my opinion of something. My job is to enhance someone’s life just by giving them something new to think about and that is the accomplishment.

So, a sense of accomplishment isn’t always derived from academic or financial achievement, and in my limited view of the world, it almost never comes from material success. Sometimes just being who you are and contributing to the world around you makes the longest-lasting difference.

Were you “meant” to be who you are, though? That’s a question best left to you. Only you can evaluate your level personal satisfaction from the world you’ve created for yourself. You are who you are, right or wrong. So like I heard once in a song, “This is it. This is life, the one you get, so go and have a ball.” And enjoy being you. It doesn’t matter how you got there.

 
Gery L. Deer is an independent columnist and business writer based in Jamestown, Ohio. More at www.gerydeer.com.

, , , , , ,

Excuse me; is that your nose in my business?

In Children and Family, Entertainment, Opinion, psychology, sociology, Uncategorized on May 8, 2013 at 2:43 pm

Deer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

On "Bewitched," nosey neighbor, Gladys Kravits (Alice Pearce) always got more than she bargained for with her cup of sugar!

On “Bewitched,” nosey neighbor, Gladys Kravits (Alice Pearce) always got more than she bargained for with her cup of sugar!

Fifteen years ago, I was shopping for my first house when I realized I had no idea exactly what it was I wanted. I grew up on a farm with a house smack in the middle of a valley of trees, pasture and corn fields so I was lacking some of the social necessities of being a ‘neighbor.’

I had no idea what it meant to have to “keep up with the Joneses,” and I never saw my mother so desperate for sweetener that she needed to bang on someone else’s door and demand they fill her measuring cup with sugar. I just didn’t get it. And, after a good fifteen years, I still don’t.

Growing up in such isolation taught me self-reliance and a good feeling for minding my own business. Even as an adult, as public as I might seem between my published work, music and television appearances, I tend to be a bit of an introvert. It’s not that I’m unfriendly, quite the opposite, but I just feel like I should keep my nose in my own cupboard and leave others to do the same.

For some, however, that’s not the case. When I first considered a suburban home, I visited several developments and each put me in mind of TV shows of years past. On TV, the houses looked all the same and there was always that one, nosey neighbor who just couldn’t keep off your grass.

Inevitably, I think of Gladys Kravits, the screeching butinsky from “Bewitched,” who spent her day tormenting her happily ignorant husband Abner all about the goings on at the Stevens home across the street. Granted, there were weird things happening on Morning Glory Circle (that’s the street where Samantha and Darren lived on the show), but rarely did those events directly impact the neighbors.

I tend to be an observer of human behavior, which helps me, I hope, to be a good writer. I’ve noticed over the years that the preoccupation of people with the activities of their neighbors can be close to a debilitating obsession.

Constant worry about the concerns of others is, to my mind, ridiculous and kind of neurotic. What if you did nothing all day but ponder such things like … When did John cut his grass – for the tenth time? How did Bob buy that above ground pool when he doesn’t make that kind of money? Do those people have anything else to do but remodel their house every month?

It can get out of control. I’m hoping that level of unwarranted curiosity isn’t the norm but the exception. I would hate to think that my comings and goings were costing a good night’s sleep to anyone but me. That’s not to say that even rural suburbs don’t offer some level of low-brow entertainment of a kind that would even sour Jerry Springer’s sensibilities.

Fortunately, where I finally chose to buy a home turned out to be the perfect fit for me. But I know people who live in suburbs where you can’t make a move without someone commenting on it or having an opinion to gossip about. I’m sure it happens everywhere, but I think people should spend their time worrying about their own lives and stay out of the affairs of others.

If the concerns of those around you occupy your thoughts more than your own actions, it might be time to take a look in a mirror instead of out the front window. Being nosey isn’t the same as being neighborly.

Thoughtful compassion for a neighbor with a sick parent or welcoming a new baby is not the same as feeling the compulsion to always see what’s going on next door. It’s important for people to know the difference and respect those boundaries.

 

Gery L. Deer is an independent business writer and contributor to the WDTN-TV2 show, “Living Dayton.” More at http://www.gerydeer.com

, , , ,

Money cannot buy eternal salvation

In Charities, Media, National News, Opinion, psychology, Religion, television, Uncategorized on April 30, 2013 at 10:55 am

EVANGDeer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

Have you ever turned on the TV early on a weekend morning and heard something like this, “Friends, dig deep for those green rockets of salvation. Help us to lead the sheep to His lovin’ care with your kind love offering. Operators are standing by to pray with you – all for just $49.99.” A cross between an infomercial and a bad Saturday Night Live parody, television evangelists have been conning millions from the pockets of the devout since the medium was invented.

These clergy-covered con men (and women) take the stage amidst gold-plated, throne-like chairs, religious statuary and acrylic podiums to convince us all that we’re damned to the fiery pits of Hell unless we give and give generously. Armani-suited, well-quaffed, jewel-bedazzled TV preachers spout dramatic sermons from a teleprompter while holding up a Bible as if it were the newly presented cub in the Lion King movie.

If that’s not enough drama, it’s is followed by repeated moments of squint-eyed, hand-raised prayer and Lord praising before thousands of onlookers in the audience who are doing the same. Without opening their eyes, the host preacher prays that God will direct the viewers to the telephone number that appears at the bottom of the screen and give generously to the ministry so that more souls can be saved.

At home, viewers dial quickly, handing over millions upon millions of dollars to what could easily be compared to a guy begging on a highway exit ramp. The difference is that at least you know the panhandler is exactly that. He’s not pretending to give you a direct phone line to eternal salvation at the same time.

Holier-than-thou in their demeanor and testimony, eventually they fall from their pedestals in some kind of sex scandal or tax evasion allegations. I’m sure everyone remembers the rise and fall of Jim and Tammy Baker, Oral Roberts and Jimmy Swaggart.

Religious panhandling – might as well call it by name – is a real problem in America and, unfortunately, it’s completely legal and largely tax-exempt. For the truly devout, there is a clear understanding that man is meant to be humble and kneel before God. That doesn’t mean we were meant to live in abject poverty, but we’re not supposed to use the Almighty as a way to dupe billions of dollars out of unsuspecting people searching for answers in a life full of uncertainty and hardship.

With multi-million-dollar homes, limousines and servants, there is nothing holy about these so-called “evangelists.” In fact, in my opinion, it’s just flat out criminal. These people soil the image and intentions of faithful, honest people all over the country who are genuinely trying to do some good in the world. Most live modestly, often with a second job or from a share of whatever comes in the offering on Sunday morning. There are no limousines, golden thrones or evangelical stadiums.

There is nothing to excuse the fact that some of the poorest people in America, the elderly, are the most common victims to this kind of nonsense. Looking for spiritual leadership and often lonely and shut-in, seniors often send money to these TV charlatans before even paying for food and medicine.

Of course, these religious phonies don’t care who they hurt because they can hide out in tax-sheltered mansions, go for a dip in their Olympic-sized swimming pools or jet off to vacation homes in the Cayman Islands.

Not convinced? According to CelebrityNetWorth.Com, one of the most popular TV evangelists, Benny Hinn, is worth more than $42 million; all from donations to his “ministry.” Another extremely popular – and rich – television pastor, Joel Osteen, is reportedly roughing it on only $40 million. And more money is still pouring in.

I don’t have a problem with people living prosperously and giving generously from hard work and the success built from that labor. I am deeply offended, however, when those claiming to be men and women of God live in luxury at the expense and from the charity of lost souls desperately searching for comfort. It would do them well to go read that book they’re always waiving around on TV; particularly the book of Matthew, Chapter 19, Verse 24.

 

 

, , , , ,

Don’t Panic. Really, we mean it this time.

In Books, Literature, Media, National News, Opinion, Politics, psychology, sociology on April 17, 2013 at 7:00 am

Deer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

dontpanicIn 1978, a radio comedy called The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, written by Douglas Adams, aired as a series on the BBC. Hitchhiker’s was a wholly remarkable radio show that eventually became a wholly remarkable television program, and a series of wholly remarkable – not to mention lucrative – novels, five in the so-called trilogy. A sixth novel was completed by a different author in 2009, eight years after Adams’ untimely death.

Commonly known by fans as, “HG2G,” Hitchhiker’s was essentially a parody of age-old science fiction with a satirical spin. The story line is filled with political satire and a pinch of sarcastic banter, the focus of which was the “establishment,” whatever that meant to the reader.

The story begins with one ordinary man’s adjustment to being transported from Earth only moments before it is destroyed to make way for a bypass for space ships. Suddenly thrust into a galaxy of crazy characters and a manically depressed robot named Marvin, human Arthur Dent is dumbstruck by his complete lack of ability to adapt.

Arthur’s friend Ford, an intergalactic researcher who rescued Arthur from his doomed world, finds his way through the galaxy hitchhiking and following the advice of an electronic book, whose cover is inscribed, in large, friendly letters, with the words, “Don’t Panic.” As the pair travels through the stars, Arthur finds little comfort in his new life except for the constant search for a nice hot cup of tea and the friendly inscription on the cover of his electronic guidebook.

A prolific writer and avid environmentalist, Douglas Adams may be single-handedly responsible for inventing the concept of the e-reader (which is essentially what the “Guide” was) nearly three decades before Amazon, the iPad or even the Internet ever existed. Adams also managed to show us the world more as it really it is than how we’d rather it be. I think that’s where, “Don’t Panic,” came from in the first place.

As Adams’ character, Arthur Dent found out, there are simply things we cannot control so the best thing to do is try to keep our heads and move through it. By a curious coincidence, as I watched the tragic events of terrorism unfold in Boston this week, I found myself thinking about the cover of Adams’ book and those large, friendly letters. “Don’t Panic” seemed like just the kind of thing you’d want someone to say to you at a moment like that.

I’ve never been in a situation like a terrorist bombing, but I have had my share of life and death scrapes over the years. From a head-on truck crash that should have certainly killed me to dealing with the painful helplessness of watching my mother whither away from Alzheimer’s disease, I have learned which things I should panic about and what I should try to just push through. And I don’t believe I’m alone in that practice, by any stretch of the imagination.

Given the circumstances, there is no level of security that could have prevented what happened in Boston. But when it did, people clearly pushed their fear and panic aside, stepped up and did their best to help each other through a horrible situation. Human beings are resilient, even though some might seem like they’re not. We’ve managed around 15 million years of evolution so there must be something to us, right?

I had the good fortune to meet Douglas Adams in 1992 when he came to Dayton for a book signing. Thanks to a fortuitous hiccup in the autograph line, I found myself standing in front of the author for several minutes. He was as gracious and humble, kindly asking how I liked his work.

As we chatted, I asked him what it meant – Don’t Panic. He said simply, “Whatever you need it to.” He also told me I should continue writing and not let the problems of the world interfere with my creativity and positive outlook. I’ve tried hard to do both. So the next time you’re faced with a tough situation just remember the Hitchhiker’s cover line: Don’t Panic. After all, what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.

Gery L. Deer is an independent columnist and business writer based in Jamestown, Ohio. More at http://www.gerydeer.com

, , , , , ,

Annette made it cool to be good.

In Entertainment, Local News, Media, National News, Opinion, psychology, sociology, television, Uncategorized on April 8, 2013 at 9:45 pm

Deer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

Frankie Avalon & Annette Funicello (1960s)

Frankie Avalon & Annette Funicello (1960s)

In 1955, Walt Disney personally selected, 12-year-old, Annette Funicello to become one of the first “Mouseketeers” on the original Mickey Mouse Club television series. She’d been discovered in a production of Swan Lake at the Starlight Bowl in Burbank California but quickly became one of America’s best known actresses.

A gifted actor, singer and dancer, Funicello’s formidable years were spent growing up in front of a camera. In 1960, she hung up her bowed mouse ears and signature white sweater bearing her name (reading simply, “Annette”) to take on a movie career, but never shook her “America’s sweetheart” image.

During the 1960’s, Funicello appeared in a series of beach party movies with singer Frankie Avalon. Though they lived very separate lives off-screen, the two were so successful and appeared so often together on screen, most people believed they were actually married.

Annette continued working through the next two decades in reunion beach movies, television appearances and as the ultimate “mom” figure in Skippy peanut butter commercials. Her death on April 8, from complications related to Multiple Sclerosis, saddened millions of fans around the world, but her “goody two shoes” image never faded, even at 70.

After the success of the Mickey Mouse Club, Disney tried to revamp the show; first with a syndicated version in 1977 and then on the Disney cable network for a healthy, seven-year run. While they did turn out some great talent, neither reboot had cast members with quite the same popular appeal of the original.

Many of the Mouseketeers from the first series went on to have long, successful careers, in front of and behind the camera. Likewise, several modern pop stars got their start with Mickey including Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake, and Christina Agulera, just to name a few.

There’s no question these talented people will leave their mark, but it’s hard to imagine anyone remembering Britney or Justin in the same way as the previous generations remember Annette and her fellow Mouseketeers. In those days, the standards for behavior, public and private, were far higher, although somewhat unrealistic.

Anyone in the public eye under the Disney logo had to be the model of the boy or girl next door, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Any variation from that image meant a summary dismissal by Walt himself. The fact was, sometimes there were problems no one outside ever saw and those kids were discharged anyway. When scandal attached itself to a young actor, the “cute factor” could no longer be exploited and a replacement would have to be found in a quickly executed and masterful work of marketing sleight of hand.

Of course no one working on television in the 1950’s was as squeaky clean as they were made out to be on the air, but they did their best to maintain their image, at least enough to stay employed. In retrospect, it may not be such a bad thing if studios re-instituted Walt’s no-tolerance attitude so long as the performers are under contract. With justice and good sense taking a backseat to public demand for perpetuation of pop culture icons, it’s not right that celebrities wear bad behavior like a badge of honor.

What kind of example does that set for young people? Isn’t that the question that’s always being asked by the media “experts” who admonish someone out of one side of their mouths while out of the other side giving a pass to Lindsay Lohan for her latest drug-induced infraction? American society is riddled with double standards and a declining sense of integrity and self-worth.

It seems today that people are more likely to be ridiculed for staying clear of drugs, alcohol and other life-wrecking activities while others are honored for completing a 12-step program after the fact. Seems a bit backwards, doesn’t it? There should be more honor and reward in having avoided the problem in the first place than to have succumbed.

Who knows, maybe the Mickey Mouse Club’s day is done and the clubhouse should remain boarded up and dark until a new generation decides it’s cool to be good again.

 

, , , , , , , , ,

Jamestown family presents country music variety show to help pay deceased mother’s medical debt

In Charities, Children and Family, Entertainment, Local News, Media, National News, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, sociology, Theatre, Travel, Uncategorized on March 1, 2013 at 7:57 pm
Lois Deer (center) with The Brothers & Co. members Gary Deer Jr., Gery Deer, and husband Gary Deer Sr. at the Jamestown Opera House in 2010

Lois Deer (center) with The Brothers & Co. members Gary Deer Jr., Gery Deer, and husband Gary Deer Sr. at the Jamestown Opera House in 2010

JAMESTOWN, OH – Exciting country music variety entertainment returns to the stage of the historic Jamestown Opera House at 7PM, Saturday, March 23 with The Brothers & Co. Variety Show. The 90-minute, live stage show is a one-of-a-kind performance perfect for all ages, full of amazing four-part harmonies, foot-tapping instrumentation, dazzling bullwhip handling, award-winning classic magic and side-splitting comedy routines.Tickets at the door are $10 for adults, $7 for seniors and students. Children 12 and under are free. Reduced presale tickets are $7 and $5, respectively, available online by credit card and PayPal at http://www.thebrothersandcompany.com and in person at Ted’s Barber Shop, 3 W. Washington St. in Jamestown. Proceeds from this performance benefit the Lois Deer Memorial Expense Fund and the Jamestown Area Historical Society.

Following a long illness under full-time care, lifetime Jamestown Area Historical Society member, Lois Deer, passed away in 2011 at Hospice of Dayton from complications related to Alzheimer’s disease. Mrs. Deer was survived by four grand children, several great grand children, her husband Gary Sr., daughter Cathy (Deer) Wolf and two sons, the founding “brothers” of the show, Gary Jr. and Gery. As a result of her lengthy illness, the family accumulated significant debt including legal and medical expenses upwards of $10,000.

Gary Deer Sr. and Lois Deer, around 2005.

Gary Deer Sr. and Lois Deer, around 2005.

About a year ago, Gary, Sr. was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease, but has continued to work to try to pay off the debts and remain at the family farm in Jamestown where The Brothers & Co. began. But as working becomes increasingly difficult and creditors grow more impatient the debt is becoming too difficult to manage and Lois’s family has not even been able to afford a headstone for her grave in Bowersville.Having performed for literally dozens of fundraisers over the years, Gery and Gary Jr. decided to help their dad the best way they knew how. Already scheduled to perform at the Jamestown Opera House, a building Lois and Gary, Sr. helped protect from the wrecking ball, they decided to follow their parents’ example.“Even when they had little to work with themselves, my parents always did their best to help others,” says pianist Gery Deer, who also directs and produces the Brothers performances. “The Brothers & Co. wouldn’t have happened without mom so doing this show is our small attempt to help repay my parents for everything they’ve done for so many over the years and ease some of my dad’s burden.”

The Brothers & Co. Entertainers started in 1995 and their formal western costuming is a tribute to their family’s musical heritage which dates back to 1917 with Lois’s father and uncle who both performed in the Lawrence County, Ohio civic band. Best known for their covers of The Statler Brothers, their repertoire includes country and oldies by The Statler Brothers, The Monkees, John Denver, and George Jones as well as many original pieces. Each performer is involved in creating the original music and comedy routines and the group’s fourth voice, Ed Jones, cousin of the Deer brothers, is their acoustic guitarist.

“If you’ve ever seen The Statler Brothers, they’re almost as good as we are,” jokes Gary Deer, Jr., percussionist of the group. “Mostly, we want to entertain people and give them a show like most haven’t seen since the 60’s. We are hoping to raise some money for the historical society while helping dad’s situation at the same time,” he says.

Gery Deer (left) with Jim Karns in "The Vanishing Bandana" - The Brothers & Co. Variety Show

Gery Deer (left) with Jim Karns in “The Vanishing Bandana” – The Brothers & Co. Variety Show

While it might seem like it to some, the guys insist this show is not just for the older generation. “We put a modern spin on an old kind of entertainment that’s nostalgic and originally presented all at the same time,” offers bass singer, magician and the most recent addition to the quartet, Jim Karns, of Fairborn. “If you’ve never seen a live variety show, this is something the whole family will really enjoy.”As another way to raise money for their cause, commercial sponsorships for the performance ranging from $150 to $500 are also available through March 19th. Business sponsors receive a live, 30-second commercial during the performance along with a special listing and web link on thebrothersandcompany.com website and mention in all media.Video clips of the show, podcasts and the official show poster are all available at the group’s website, http://www.thebrothersandcompany.com. Doors open at 6:30PM and refreshments will be on sale by the historical society. For more information go online or call (937) 902-4857. Those unable to attend the show but that would still like to help with the memorial fund can donate directly, online, at www.indiegogo.com/projects/lois-deer-memorial-expense-fund.BUY TICKETS ONLINE NOW …

Eventbrite - The Brothers & Co. Variety Show LIVE at Jamestown Opera House

(Watch for The Brothers & Co. Entertainers on WDTN-TV2’s “Living Dayton” program, Monday March 11th at Noon on Channel 2 or watch it streaming live.)

, , , , ,

Day of Caring Announces 23rd Annual Pancake Brunch

In Charities, Children and Family, Local News, National News, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, Uncategorized on February 22, 2013 at 11:28 pm

pancakeDAYTON, OH – Day of Caring announces its upcoming 23rd Annual Pancake Brunch will be held on Sunday, February 24th in 46 locations in Montgomery and surrounding counties.  To find a list of sites in your local area, visit our website.  The intention of this annual event is charitable and 100% of the ticket sale revenue is invested directly towards helping the needy in the community where events are hosted.

Serving as Honorary Co-Chairpersons of our 2013 Pancake Brunch are Montgomery County Commissioner Debbie Lieberman and Balinda Ferrara, Client Relationship manager for the Dayton office of Merrill Lynch.

“Day of Caring continually strives to increase awareness with regard to the needs of the homeless and hungry, boost volunteerism in support of these causes and assist the various non-profit food pantries and shelters within our communities,”  commented Jan Venkayya, Executive Director of  Day of Caring.  Hans Marlette, Central Committee Chairperson, added that “the growth of the number of participating sites, sponsorships and attendees is responsible for the increased funds raised to help the ever growing needs in our area.”

Cost of the brunch is $6 for an adult, $4 for seniors (over 60) and children under (12). Tickets for the Pancake Brunch are available through the individual brunch locations, at the Day of Caring Website:  www.dayofcaring.us, or at the door. For more information, call (937) 320-1687.

Day of Caring, a 501 (c) (3)  recognized charity, was established in 1991 by a single individual in quest of empowering local communities to facilitate solutions to the ever increasing needy through volunteerism.  Day of Caring has contributed over $600,000 in the years since its inception as a result of establishing a network of over 10,000 volunteers in Montgomery and surrounding counties along with Columbus, Cincinnati and Indiana. Through a variety of fundraisers and activities, Day of Caring now serves the needy 365 days a year.

 

 This is a public service message from The Jamestown Comet.

, , ,

Equal citizenry under the 14th Amendment

In Economy, Education, Opinion, Politics, psychology, Religion, sociology, Uncategorized on January 22, 2013 at 7:04 pm

14thAmDeer In Headlines

By Gery L. Deer

With a single sentence early in the text of the Declaration of Independence, Thomas Jefferson established the concept of human equality in a fledgling country. “We hold these truths to be self-evident,” Jefferson famously penned, “that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

Ironically, many of the men who signed the final version of the document were slave owners, with no acknowledgement of the hypocrisy they were about to go to war to protect. It took more than a century after John Hancock applied his prominent penmanship to the parchment to bring about a law that would provide the basis for the ultimate guarantee of a free and equal society.  But it didn’t exactly work out that way.

Passed on July 9, 1868, the 14th Amendment of the U.S. Constitution, in theory, sets equal status for each citizen. The wording clearly recognizes “citizens” as having either been born within the country or naturalized and goes on to grant equal privileges to each with no specifically stated restrictions based on gender, ethnicity, economic status, sexual preference or anything else.

At the time it was written, America was still experiencing shell shock following the Civil War, and it would be some time before full enforcement of the 14th would be widespread. Early on, even the government seemed to be choosing to ignore its own laws wherever it pleased to do so. A large part of the virtual annihilation of the Native American populations within the United States took place after the 14th was passed.

This legislation should have immediately equalized anyone born in the country, regardless of gender or race. But this was rarely the case. Some whites, particularly in the south, rejected the concept of overall equality. Racism and general prejudice ran high throughout the region, becoming violent on far too many occasions.

For those situations not expressly dealt with under the 14th, supplemental legislation has had to be passed to address those issues. But some people are offended that any subsequent legislation is required to enforce those “unalienable rights” already granted by the Constitution.  In their eyes, doing so only serves to solidify the idea that anyone other than the able-bodied, white male was somehow inferior and now needed ‘special’ legal considerations.

Sublime in their fortitude and thirst for liberty, America’s Founding Fathers are quoted by academics, politicians, world figureheads and even religious leaders. But in many ways that honorarium is less deserved because of staggering moral shortsightedness by not extending basic civil rights to everyone. Such a simple act in the beginning may have upended the economy of the new country, but it might also have helped preempt two hundred years of prejudice, war and bloodshed.

In the end, all rights are ‘civil,’ established and enforced by duly elected representatives of the people. Even with the country so divided over these issues, the government still has a chance to enforce the original purpose of the 14th Amendment.

People are always going to be frightened of change. But the opportunity remains to squelch old prejudice and make sure that all men, all citizens, are equal under the law no matter the color of their skin, to which god they pray, or whom they choose to marry.

It may be that no more laws need to be created. Each citizen is already endowed with the rights of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness; not as much by their creator, as the 14th Amendment of the Constitution of the United States of America. If it really is the Supreme Law of the Land, it needs to be applied that way. If it doesn’t happen soon, Jefferson’s goal of an equal citizenry will never be much more than a pipe dream.

Is this your new site? Log in to activate admin features and dismiss this message
Log In