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Live Reading of Holiday Stories By Local Authors In Beavercreek Dec 7

In Business, Children and Family, Entertainment, Food, Local News, Senior Lifestyle, sociology on November 22, 2012 at 11:44 am

BEAVERCREEK, OH – On Friday, December 7th local authors of the Western Ohio Writers Association (WOWA) will present a live reading of short holiday-inspired short stories and poetry at 4 Starters Coffee Café, 2495 Commons Blvd. in Beavercreek, Ohio. An author reception will begin at 6 pm and the live readings will run from 7 pm until 9 pm. The event is free and open to the public.

Known as Beatnik Café, the relaxed, informal format of the evening pays homage to the hole-in-the-wall poetry cafes of the 1960’s in a more contemporary style. The public performance presented several times a year by members of the Western Ohio Writers Association, a resource group that provides support, education and professional assistance for writers in southwest central Ohio, eastern Indiana and northern Kentucky.

Writers in a variety of genres attend monthly WOWA critique and educational meetings where they can hone their skills and have their work reviewed by fellow scribes. Professional freelance commercial writer Gery L. Deer of Jamestown is the founder and coordinator of the organization.

“Outside of a college class or expensive writers’ conferences, there was no consistent support available in our area,” Deer said. “We started the WOWA to provide critique and networking opportunities to local writers of all genres, both amateur and professional.”

As a special addition to the event, two children’s authors, C. C. Christian, of Yellow Springs, author of The Legendary Tales of Sharktooth and Hammer, and Teasha Seitz, of Moraine, author of Little Leah Lou and Her Pink Tu will be reading original holiday stories and selling and signing copies of their books. Sharktooth is an ideal book for kids age 9-12, and Little Leah Lou is a picture book for pre-school through age 7.

“The public readings give people the opportunity to hear from some of the most talented writers in the Midwest,” Deer continued. “We invite everyone to come out and meet our writers and enjoy the atmosphere provided at 4 Starters.  It’s an ideal place to hang out, read and enjoy the work of our writers.”

The Western Ohio Writers Association events are sponsored by GLD Enterprises Commercial Writing concierge business writing services. For more information, go online to http://www.westernohiowriters.org.

Starve A Cold and Stay In Bed

In Business, Children and Family, Education, Health, Opinion, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, sociology, Uncategorized on November 20, 2012 at 9:28 am

DEER IN HEADLINES

By Gery L. Deer

 

When I was helping to care for my mother towards the end of her life, my cousin and I did everything we could to limit her exposure to even the slightest sneeze or sniffle. Everything from the bed rails to the wheelchairs was repeatedly and regularly wiped down with antibacterial solutions to prevent her from picking up a random bug that, in her weakened condition, could possibly be life-threatening.

Of course, we couldn’t protect her from everything. From time to time, we would have to take her out of the controlled environment of her home for doctor visits, family functions and sometimes just to give her some fresh air. But what I grew increasingly paranoid of was the amazing number of people who would go about their day suffering from severe colds or other illnesses, seemingly ignorant to the potential dangers they posed to others.

Despite other achievements, medical science is still remarkably ignorant of the common cold and its associated contagions. Doped up on symptom-hiding chemicals, people plod blearily through the day without a second thought to the fact that they could make others seriously ill just by being the last person to push a door open or use a shopping cart.

More mind-blowing are the numbers of healthcare workers and restaurant servers who go to work sick and are allowed to remain at their post. This is just ridiculous. I understand that it’s hard to take a day off when you’re working hour by hour but by staying home you may be losing a few bucks but you might be keeping someone else from becoming deathly ill, and getting yourself back to health a bit faster.

So how do you know when you should call in sick? On Tuesday, November 20, Dr. Holly Phillips, on CBS This Morning’s Health Watch, offered these suggestions for knowing when you should stay home. “It’s hard to know when you should call out sick,” she notes. “A fever, particularly in the 101 – 102 degree range, accompanied by aches and pains, might signal the flu, and you should definitely stay home.”

“A milder fever, sore throat white patches on tonsils indicates a strep infection and it’s probably time for some antibiotics, so a doctor visit is recommended,” she says. “A low grade fever coupled with a cough and sniffles mild signal a mild cold, so it’s your choice to stay home or not. But if you choose to go to work, be kind to your co-workers and wash your hands often and cover mouth and nose when coughing or sneezing and don’t handle food.”

Researchers say that the common cold costs American business more than $25 billion every year. More than $17 billion of that loss is attributed to people who go to work sick and are therefore less productive. In my opinion, wives tales and ignorance are also major contributors to that loss.

For years, people thought a cold or other infections illness came from being outside in the rain or by not wearing a coat outside on chilly days. These behaviors lower the immune system, but colds and other diseases come from other people through some kind of contact, either person-to-person, or person-to-object. We spread these things ourselves, no divine intervention is required. In the end, it’ll be our own ignorance that kills us.

I’m not a doctor, but I can tell you from my own experiences that the number one part of preventing colds and flu is in sanitation. Maintaining a clean sink and toilet, using liquid instead of bar soaps, paper towels or air dryers and, when you can’t wash, antibacterial wipes and gels.

An ounce of prevention really is worth a pound of cure. If you do have a cold or some other issue that has you sneezing and coughing all day, please consider those around you. Had we not been so proactive, my mother could have died much earlier from complications of what to some people are just minor respiratory issues.

If you work in food service, stay home. If you work in medical care or around kids and the elderly, stay home. And as they always say, get lots of rest and drink plenty of liquids.

 

 

Thanksgiving Travelers Encouraged to Buckle Up.

In Children and Family, Education, Health, Local News, Media, psychology, Science, sociology, State News, Travel, Uncategorized on November 13, 2012 at 3:04 pm

Every Trip. Every Time.

Xenia, Ohio – The Thanksgiving holiday period is one of the busiest travel times of the year, and the Greene County Safe Communities Coalition wants to remind all travelers, whether they’re traveling across the country or just across town, that one of the best ways to ensure a safe arrival is to buckle up, every trip, every time. 

“During the long Thanksgiving travel weekend, many more people than usual are on the roads visiting family and friends,” says Laurie Fox, Safe Communities Coordinator.  “And we want to alert everyone that perhaps the single best thing they can do to save lives and protect themselves and their passengers on our roadways is to insist on the regular and proper use of their seat belts.”  

According to the U.S. Department of Transportation’s National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA), seat belts saved more than 12,500 lives nationwide during 2010 alone. In fact, research shows that the risk of fatal injury to front seat passenger car occupants is reduced by 45-percent and the risk of moderate to serious injury is reduced by 50-percent, when seat beats are worn correctly. 

Yet, too many people are still not getting the message.  Fifty-one percent of the 22,187 passenger vehicle occupants who were killed in motor vehicle crashes during 2010 were NOT wearing seat belts at the time of their fatal crashes.

“It’s a simple step that each of us can take to protect ourselves and our loved ones.  Yet, too many people are still not buckling up — especially in the hustle and bustle of holiday travel,” says Fox. 

During the 2010 Thanksgiving holiday (which ran from 6 p.m., Wednesday, November 24, to 5:59 a.m., Monday, November 29) 337 passenger vehicle occupants were killed in motor vehicle traffic crashes nationwide, and 55-percent of those were unrestrained at the time of the crash. 

“Unfortunately, the overnight hours prove to be the most dangerous on our nation’s roadways, not only during the Thanksgiving holiday, but throughout the year,” says Fox. 

Nationally in 2010, 61-percent of the 10,647 passenger vehicle occupants who were killed in motor vehicle traffic crashes during the overnight hours (6 p.m. to 5:59 a.m.) were not wearing their seat belts at the time of the fatal crash, compared to 42-percent during the daytime hours.

During the Thanksgiving holiday weekend, 64-percent of nighttime fatalities involved unbelted passenger vehicle occupants, while only 41-percent of daytime fatalities involved unbelted passenger vehicle occupants.

“Every day of the year, but especially during more dangerous travel times like the Thanksgiving holiday and at nighttime, we are working hard to remind everyone to always buckle up,” says Fox.  “Seat belts save lives, so please buckle up, every trip, every time, and so you can give thanks this holiday season and enjoy the time with your loved ones.”

For more information about traveling safely during Thanksgiving, please visit www.TrafficSafetyMarketing.gov.  For more information on Greene County Safe Communities, please call 937-374-5669 or email lfox@gcchd.org.  The Greene County Combined Health District is a grantee of the Ohio Department of Public Safety, Office of Ohio Criminal Justice Services, Traffic Safety Division.

There’s No Place Like Home. Again.

In Business, Children and Family, Economy, Home Improvement, Jobs, Local News, Media, Opinion, psychology, sociology, State News, Uncategorized on November 13, 2012 at 12:39 pm

DEER IN HEADLINES

By Gery L. Deer

Economists suggest that the Great Recession is over, but the aftereffects are still quite apparent. Along with record unemployment and a troubled political landscape the fiscal meltdown left one more frightening thing in its wake … junior, who came back home to live in your basement.

According to a February 14, 2012 story in Time magazine, more than 25 million adults returned to live with their parents because they are either unemployed or underemployed, or for a variety of other reasons, primarily economic. Another piece in a recent edition of USA Today quotes Paul Taylor, director of the Pew Research Center’s Social & Demographic Trends project.  “This is a case of families adapting to difficult circumstances,” he says. “Family is the ultimate social safety net.”

A temporary social safety net, yes, but it shouldn’t be indefinite. Most of the adults, single men and women between the ages of 22 and 34, moved back in with Mom and Dad because he or she could not find work in the same field or at a previous level of employment. With rent and other necessities becoming more difficult to manage, they end up on the doorstep of their family home hoping for a fresh start.

Unfortunately, because of lackluster employment growth in America, there seems to be very little light at the end of the tunnel for those empty nesters who invited kids back into the fold with open arms, but many of whom who were also ready to settle in and enjoy retirement. Instead, they’ve been returned to the days before the kids shipped off to the ivy covered walls of college.

Practical society places great importance on financial and personal independence and the idea that your job defines you. For most people moving back to the family home is a last resort and can often have a profound effect on the ego and the social life; a state to be avoided if at all possible.

For others, however, it’s just a cheap way to get out of having to actually look for a job. If you’re a parent whose children have returned to overstay their welcome, the main question now is when to show Maynard G. Krebs the door. Since you’re home with your adult kids, you can explain who he is after they read this.

It’s hard to say when it’s time to cut the purse strings. The lack of self-esteem brought on by unemployment and social rejection can really have a crushing effect on your child’s motivation to change a comfortable, safe situation.

After a time, gentle encouragement might be ineffective and you may need to use stronger, more direct measures. You might try saying something like, “Junior, it’s time for you to take whatever job you can and get back out there.” If that doesn’t work, try “Get out.” Just kidding; unless you think it would work then feel free to use the quote.

Kids, when you come back home, be respectful of the fact that it is still your parents’ house and you need to do whatever you can to make your stay effortless for them. Do your own laundry, cook, buy your own food, help with bills wherever possible and, by all means, be grateful!

Things will get better out there. There has been some improvement and there are jobs available. Sometimes it’s necessary to swallow one’s pride and take whatever work comes along, always striving to get back to wherever it is you want to be. Just keep at it and don’t give up.

 

Is PBS television for rich people? Ask Mitt.

In Children and Family, Education, Entertainment, Health, Media, National News, Opinion, television on October 16, 2012 at 9:22 pm

DEER IN HEADLINES

By Gery L. Deer

Poor Big Bird; he was just walking around Sesame Street minding his own business, collecting a government paycheck – just like Mitt Romney – and the next thing he knew he was the topic of national political debate. The former Massachusetts governor has made it clear he intends to end funding to the Public Broadcasting Service. If he were old enough to vote – and human – he would go to the polls and help re-elect President Obama, if for no other reason than just to keep his job.

Sadness has gripped Hooper’s Store. No one’s buying sodas. Oscar the Grouch is even more cross than ever, and Cookie Monster is so distraught he turned down a plate full of chocolate chip raisin. If that isn’t bad enough, Charlie Rose might have to get a personality and stay on morning news television, evicted forever from his blackened studio.

If Mitt Romney has his way, hard line left wingers will have to find somewhere else to distribute their propaganda besides public television. But, aren’t the republicans the ones who are always saying that PBS is television for rich people? So, if that’s true, shouldn’t Romney be trying to preserve this refuge for every 20-year-old British television show ever produced? Nope. In Romney’s eyes, PBS is a complete and total waste of taxpayer dollars.

Seriously though, make a list of all the wasteful spending Congress will pass in a single year and the resulting torrential flood of pointless programs and pet projects funded in the billions by tax dollars would stagger the imagination. There’s nothing wasteful about PBS and it costs more to fill the presidential limousine once than public television costs the individual taxpayer for a year.

Fact: PBS accounts for only 0.00012 percent of the country’s budget. That’s about $1.35 per person, per year. That’s it. That’s what Romney is saying should be cut from the budget to reduce the deficit. He needs a calculator and some fact checking – something that’s not happening much in the current campaign.

In a country where we underfund schools and undervalue teachers, the American educational system needs all the help it can get and PBS offers that support.

Perhaps a more practical way to ensure the public is getting its money’s worth on PBS is to check over their spending. Paula Kerger, the PBS CEO earns just over $623.000. Is there a need for such a high, six-figure salaries at the Corporation for Public Broadcasting? What about the the political side?

Is the overall message coming from PBS programming too liberally biased? If the tax payers are funding the programs, they should be neutral – fair and unbiased. But that’s not the generally sense.

Most conservatives believe that PBS is harshly liberal, anti-American and catering to the rich, democratic elite. Most liberals think that people who don’t watch Upstairs Downstairs, or PBS Newshour, just for example, are uninformed, unsophisticated and brain dead. Well, there’s probably some truth to both of those statements. But the value of PBS is not in the news or bad English sitcoms.

The majority of those who benefit from public television are underprivileged children. In defense of PBS, commentators and pundits are saying that PBS is one of the most valuable video resources for school teachers and students, providing a type of professionally-made educational programming that is free to the public.

No, Mr. Romney, Big Bird isn’t the problem with the deficit. Your overpaid, over privileged friends in Congress are responsible for the out of control spending. Never do they have to watch a true budget, forever dipping into the bottomless pocket of the suffering tax payer.

Additionally, with all of the economic difficulty befalling the country right now, should the focus of the candidates really be on Big Bird and PBS? It just offers more proof how out of touch both of these candidates are with the problems faced by the regular people of America.

Greene County Combined Health District receives $41,999.99 in Traffic Safety Grants

In Children and Family, Education, Health, Local News, Media, State News, Uncategorized on October 12, 2012 at 7:37 am

Federal Funds from Office of Criminal Justice Services Help Save Lives in Greene County

 

XENIA, OH – Laurie Fox, Greene County’s Safe Communities Coordinator, announced today that the Ohio Department of Public Safety’s (ODPS) Office of Criminal Justice Services (OCJS) awarded $41,999.99 in federal traffic safety funding to the Greene County Combined Health District’s Safe Communities program for federal
fiscal year 2013.

“Partnerships are critical to the success of any safety effort and we are committed to working with law enforcement and other safety partners to address traffic safety concerns in Greene County,” said Fox.

The Greene County Safe Communities Coalition has identified that lack of seat belt use, motorcycle safety and distracted/impaired driving is impacting the safety and welfare of the citizens of Greene County. To save lives and improve the quality of life for our citizens, the Safe Communities Coalition will use the grant funds to increase awareness about distracted and impaired driving in the local high schools, motorcycle safety, and continue to educate the public on the importance of seat belt use through participation in local festivals, school presentations and other programming.

The funds are passed through OCJS from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration to support the efforts of safety partners statewide and focus on traffic safety priority areas such as restraint use, impaired driving, motorcycle safety and youthful drivers.

Competitive grant proposals are accepted and reviewed by OCJS. The FFY 2013 competitive grant process solicited grant proposals from state agencies, non-profit organizations, colleges, universities, hospitals, political subdivisions and other interested groups within selected Ohio counties and jurisdictions (based upon the number of fatal crashes).

For more information about the Office of Criminal Justice Services and statewide efforts to improve safety on Ohio’s roadways, log on to http://www.ocjs.ohio.gov.

TWilly’s FrozenYogurt Café Offers An Adventure

In Business, Children and Family, Economy, Entertainment, Food, National News, Senior Lifestyle, State News, Uncategorized on September 21, 2012 at 7:00 am

T-Willy’s Yogurt Emporium owner, Wendy Preiser

WASHINGTON TWP. / CENTERVILLE – If you think you know what a Velvet Elvis might be, you could be wrong. Instead of a framed piece of retro artwork, imagine swirls of chocolate, soft-serve yogurt, add two slices of flamed bananas, a squirt of peanut butter topping and a generous sprinkling of maple sugar potato chips. How’s that for something “the King” might have had on his table?

That’s just a taste of what is available at T-Willy’s Yogurt Emporium, the newest tenant of Washington Square Shopping Center in Centerville. On Saturday, September 29, T-Willy’s invites everyone to join them in celebrating a brand-new way of enjoying frozen soft-served yogurt during a special, grand opening event.

Beginning with the official ribbon cutting for invited guests at 10 a.m., T-Willy’s will open from 11 a.m. until 10 p.m. for an exciting day of door prizes, samplers and much more. According to shop owner, Wendy Preiser, T-Willy’s Yogurt Emporium is not just another soft serve yogurt café. It’s also about exploring your creative, adventurous side.

“Our store is about trying something new,” Preiser says. “There will always be something to intrigue and inspire our customers.”

Inspiration can certainly be found everywhere in the shop, from the adventurous mural on the wall to the gigantic, tree-trunk toppings table. There’s even an antique, manual typewriter, complete with post cards, all set to take down your special story. If the atmosphere isn’t enough, the myriad of yogurt and sorbet flavors is sure to turn a head or two.

T-Willy’s offers a rotating menu of specially blended frozen yogurt flavors including Blueberry Burst, New York Cheesecake, White Chocolate Macadamia and Tart Cranberry Hibiscus. Of course chocolate and vanilla are available for those who want an old favorite. All of the yogurt and toppings are sold by the ounce, in cups.   Mixing and matching is highly encouraged. There are always options that have no sugar added and most are gluten free.

Originally from Chicago, Preiser completed her undergraduate education at Northwestern University and received a Master of Business Administration from the Kellogg School of Management. After years working in new product development with food companies like Sara Lee Bakery, Nestle Chocolate and Birds Eye Foods, Preiser set out in her new business venture with the knowledge that today’s families are always on the lookout for great-tasting, healthier choices.

T-Willy’s frozen soft serve offers one of the highest counts of live and active yogurt cultures. The average 4-ounce serving contains less than 0.5 grams of dairy butter fat. “Yogurt is such a great basis because it is healthy, tasty and fun,” Preiser says. “My philosophy on food is that we should pay more attention to what we put in our bodies and less about what we leave out.  If we eat consciously, the occasional treat can be good for us physically and especially emotionally.”

T-Willy’s Frozen Yogurt Emporium is located at 6085 Far Hills Ave., near Boston Stoker and just across the parking lot from Dorothy Lane Market. To learn more about T-Willy’s Yogurt Emporium, including the incredible tale of T-Willy, go online to www.twillysyogurt.com or call 937-567-7818. T-Willy’s is open daily during the summer from 11 a.m. until 10 p.m. and until 8 p.m. from October through April.

Greene County Authors Featured At Lebanon Book Signing

In Business, Children and Family, Education, Entertainment, Local News, Media, National News, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, State News, Uncategorized on September 10, 2012 at 7:18 pm

Authors C.C. Christian and R.G. Huxley

Lebanon, OH – On Saturday, September 15, Chapters Pre-Loved Books, in Lebanon will host a reading and book signing featuring two, newly published Miami Valley writers. From 1 p.m. until 3 p.m., visitors have the chance to meet C.C. Christian, author of the middle grade adventure novel, The Legendary Tales of Sharktooth and Hammer – The Awakening and R.G. Huxley, author of paranormal thriller, The Cleansing.

Celebrating two years in business, Chapters Pre-Loved Books is a locally-owned, family-operated bookstore located at 726 E. Main St. in Lebanon, at the west end of the Colony Square Shopping Center. Unlike the cramped, musty used bookstores people may be used to, Chapters offers a more upscale experience. A wide selection of new and used books, games, puzzles and more are offered in a welcoming atmosphere which includes a pleasant decor, wide aisles, comfortable seating, coffee and tea for purchase, free wireless internet access, and a welcoming atmosphere.

Yellow Springs, Ohio native C. C. Christian began her writing career unexpectedly by telling stories to her two sons which eventually led to The Legendary Tales of Sharktooth and Hammer – The Awakening.  The story revolves around two young sharks named Sharktooth and his best friend Hammer who set out on a journey to discover the truth of The Battle of the Great Canal – a war that ultimately changed the future of their colony forever.

First in a series of three, the novel is packed with action but, as Christian notes, it’s educational as well. “The story line presents many situations that people, especially kids, face every day,” she says. “This book is meant not only to entertain, but to enlighten and peak the readers’ curiosity about many topics and places.”

Richard (R.G.) Huxley grew up in Fairborn, Ohio. His paranormal crime novel, The Cleansing, follows former police detective Jack Angel, a man who could, at one time, literally feel and see a crime from the point of the victims. When three pastors go mad and try to cleanse themselves by fire right in front of their congregations, one survivor may hold the answer to the disappearance of Angel’s daughter, drawing him reluctantly back into his old life.

“The idea (for the book) came to me one day out of the blue,” Huxley explains. “I remember sitting at my desk and watching a trailer online and it showed this guy walking around the woods and he was engulfed in flames. He wasn’t fighting the blaze and I wondered what if he set the fire himself?”

Excerpts from the books are available from each of the authors’ respective websites, http://www.sharktoothandhammer.com and http://www.rghuxley.com. Visitors to the signing and store anniversary event will receive special pricing, autographs, photo opportunities with the authors and more. For detailed information visit http://www.chaptersprelovedbooks.com or call (513) 934-BOOK (2665).

 

Has Anybody Seen My Youth?

In Children and Family, Education, Health, Opinion, psychology, Senior Lifestyle, Uncategorized on August 28, 2012 at 9:34 am

By Gery L. Deer

Deer In Headlines

One morning I woke up, looked in the mirror and realized there was an old, wrinkly guy with graying hair staring back at me where, just yesterday it seemed, stood a young, freckle-faced kid. I could have sworn I had my youth here somewhere. Did I put it in a drawer someplace and forget? Did it get sent to the dry cleaners? Maybe it vanished in the clothes dryer, vanquished forever to whatever dimension socks disappear to.

Whatever happened to my youth, I’m pretty sure it wasn’t my fault. I did everything you’re supposed to do. I lived life, abstaining from things like alcohol, drugs, partying, and excesses of all kinds. I worked out, rode a bike, ate the best food I could, maintained a clean, healthy lifestyle and yet one day, poof – it was gone.

But where did it go? Is it like your lap, which, once you stand up, disappears to wherever laps go when they’re not needed? Is youth something you have to manage or tend, like a garden, constantly cultivating it to maintain its productivity? It’s as though someone just snuck in one night while I was sleeping and made off with it like having your newspaper stolen from the front porch.

Preparing to shave I realize that there seems to be more hair than before – but all in the wrong places. At what point does some gene activate that forces the follicles to move from the scalp and infiltrate the ears and nose without mercy? White, wiry, and rampaging like an army of dandelions in the yard, there seems to be no stopping them. Horribly painful but thoroughly useless, yanking them out only seems to quadruple their numbers within moments. Has anybody seen my youth?

I rub my eyes and splash water in my face, hoping the fog will clear. Nope, still blurry. On the counter lay a pair of bifocals with large, metallic rims. Unfolding them, I perch them on my hair-encroached nose and the image clears but makes no move toward beautification. Seriously. Has anybody seen my youth?

Toweling off my face, I return to sit on the edge of the bed, switching on the television news. The perky young anchorwoman is clearly mouthing something but there’s no sound. Hmm, must be a technical difficulty. I click the channel changer and every station seems to have the same issue. People’s lips are moving, but they aren’t saying anything. Even the commercials seem mute. Mute – that was it. Maybe I hit the mute button.

Thumbing the volume I ratchet up the sound, watching the green bar on the display creep ever higher. Fifty, sixty, seventy, at last! Sound! I decide that there must be something wrong with the speaker. The scale only goes to 100. Can it be that loud? Or … what if the new crop of weeds in my ears is deafening me? Breakfast. That’ll help.

In the kitchen, I reach for the cereal box and pour some into a bowl. Opening the refrigerator, I pull out what looks like a milk carton and splash some over the dry, twig-like contents of the bowl. What is this? I stir the spoon around in what could only be described as hay, doused in murky-white water. Yuck. When did I start eating this? Where are the red hearts, yellow moons and green clovers? Where are the marshmallows, the secret prize inside and the colorful cartoon characters smiling from the box label shilling their sugary goodness? All gone. It seems now the only things that snap crackle or pop in the morning are my joints. Has anybody seen my youth?

I know it was here before. I was full of energy, new ideas and visions of the future. I remember just yesterday feeling like I had the world at my feet. Now, I watch as it whizzes past me, like I’m walking backwards on a crowded sidewalk. Has anybody seen my youth?

Ok, they always say when you lose something you will always find it in the last place you look. And sure enough, there it was tucked quietly away in my heart. I guess I had it all the time.

DEER IN HEADLINES is sponsored by:

The Legendary Tales of Sharktooth & Hammer –  The Awakening

By C.C. Christian

Are Men and Women Really From Two Different Planets?

In Children and Family, Health, Opinion, psychology, sociology on August 28, 2012 at 7:03 am

By Gery L. Deer

Deer In Headlines

“Honey, does this dress make me look fat?” Even typing out the words made me shiver a little at the thought of having to answer this mousetrap of a question. The inquiry is usually fired across the bow just before leaving for an evening out. Once the wrong answer is uttered by the man, the woman proceeds to make his life miserable for the remainder of the night – or longer.

Back in 1992, author John Gray decided to put an end to the ambiguity surrounding the behavior of men and women by declaring we were from different planets, at least figuratively. “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” was a runaway best seller, inspiring sequel, a board game, and television programs for years to follow.

In his book, Gray adopted the planet metaphor as the central theme, likening men and women to the classical Greek god Mars and goddess Venus as ideal types. I take issue with this since it tends to lump men and women into categories that we don’t always fit, but for our purposes here, let’s say he is correct.

In that case, what’s the right answer to the, “Do I look fat” question? Your guess is as good as mine. Most guys chicken out and go for the safe response. “Oh honey,” they squeak from behind a locked bathroom door. “You look great in anything.”

If you hide, you don’t see “the look” you’re getting from her. Guys, you all know the one I mean. Every woman has one, fire from the eyes glare reserved especially for us whenever we’ve said something unacceptable. If we hide, we’re going on the assumption that if we can’t see you, you can’t see us and therefore the reign of terror resulting from our unbelievably patronizing answer will never actually strike us.

Cowards! Why don’t you come out and say it. “Yes, it does make you look fat. You shouldn’t be wearing that skirt it looks like it was sprayed on. And don’t even get me started on that animal print blouse, could you even show more skin?”

Now, would I say that? No way. I wouldn’t say anything even close to that. At the same time, I don’t cower behind a door either. My comeback is generally something like, “How does it make you feel?”

This kind of answer is honest with the intention of getting her to admit their insecurities to herself instead of beating me up because they feel unattractive for whatever reason. After all, they don’t really want you to answer the question.

What they’re really doing is fishing for an unsolicited compliment. Don’t fall into that trap guys, if you do, you are doomed … doomed I tell you! Once the question’s out there, it’s not unsolicited anymore.  In fact, there is no right answer and even if there were, it wouldn’t be appropriate to every woman or every situation.

Ok, so now that the women in the audience are fuming, let’s turn it back on the guys for a moment. Ladies, what would you say if your husband or boyfriend came strutting from behind the bedroom door and said, “Honey, how do I look?”

You gasp when you see your balding, somewhat paunchy, 40-something husband wearing an outfit that a teenager shouldn’t even have on. What do you say to him?

That’s easy. You’d say, “Are you crazy? Take that off this minute you look ridiculous.” You don’t care that you crushed his ego, ripped the dignity from his body, threw it on the floor and stomped on it. You just don’t want to be embarrassed, and rightfully so.

The difference is that guys don’t tell women what we really think for fear of reprisal. Men rarely have anything to leverage that a woman can’t live without. Like it or not fellows, we guys might like to believe we are the superior gender but we couldn’t be more wrong about anything.

The truth is that generally women save us guys from making utter fools of ourselves in more ways than I have space to list in this column. I don’t know what planet they’re originally from, but I’m glad they landed on this one. So when she asks, tell her how beautiful she is and give her a big hug. That’s really all it takes.

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